that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize