I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
