You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
