I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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