wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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