I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
