i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize