my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
