can u get pink eye on your cock?
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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