Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Randomize