We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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