In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
