I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
