i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I supernannyed him into submission
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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