I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
