Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
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