Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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