On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize