i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
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