omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
No...this little piggys going to the bar
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
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