Who did Billy Mays play for?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize