i think i have two assholes
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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