Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
bring money and cleavage
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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