Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
