So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
