he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
i love accidental penises.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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