Do you still have your period?
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
