It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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