the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
there is puke in my bra ... again
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