So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
