Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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