He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
