Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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