I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
