so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
