What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
