why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
