What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
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