what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
They have beer where we have blood.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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