That's intense
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
