I hope mine doesn't look like that
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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