the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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