Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
