I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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