READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize