Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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