you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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