I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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