The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Randomize
