So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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