i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
